Saying YES is SO FUN.

We are alive!  We really are!

I have been a bit of a blog slacker lately, it's true.  It's not because I have nothing to say...we all know that would never be the case!  ;) It's just that we've been go, go, going like crazy and I simply haven't had the time to tell you all about it.

Delicious stop along the way

I'm a broken record, but I really can't believe how good God is.  Every time we have a worry He covers it.  A couple weeks ago we were worried about how we would be able to get the word out further than just the people we know right now.  We didn't have speaking engagements lined up, though we'd put the word out to many, many pastors.  We just weren't getting a response.  Oh dear, how we love to just hop in and take matters into our own hands.  All the while God just watches us with a little smirk on His face like "Oh this'll rich.  I can't wait to see what they do."  And all the while He KNOWS exactly what HE wants to do, and if we'll be still enough to give Him the right of way things turn out so much better.  Whew.  Still learning that one...obviously.

Tongue of concentration

We were worried about getting the chance to share and then when we had nothing left to do but sit and wait God had His way.  BAM.  We've been busier than ever sharing the word about Wide Awake and it couldn't be more awesome.

A couple weeks ago we got to share about Wide Awake with a church on the coast.  The people were so welcoming, so warm, almost giddy with excitement to hear what God is doing.  Awesome.

 

Then this past weekend we got the extreme honor to share Wide Awake and our story of "Yes" with the Vineyard youth of the NW at "Anthem", the NW regional youth conference.  Oh man, so stinkin' fun.

We stood in awe as many young men and women said yes to Jesus.  We got to pray over them, encourage them, cheer them on in following Jesus one step at a time.  We cried tears of joy as one girl said yes to Jesus for the very first time.  The Vineyard youth of the NW are AWESOME.  We made many new friends and hopefully we'll see many of them in Ukraine some day sayin' yes to Jesus.  :)

A big bonus of the trip was that several pastors who were there with their youth got to hear about Wide Awake and we've been invited to share at 4 more churches!  Praise God for that big answer to prayer!  The visions and dreams God has given us are too big for our church to support on its own.  Many, many hearts must get behind this thing.  We are thankful for the opportunity to share with whoever will listen!

 

What's up next
-The Wide Awake website should be up and running THIS WEEK!  Be on the lookout!  That webpage will be a great place to direct your friends who need to hear about Wide Awake.  It will also have easy ways to give financial support online.

-This blog will soon be moved to a Wordpress site.  I'll let you know when that happens, but just be forewarned...changes are a'comin!

-We'll be traveling almost every weekend between now and October, sharing Wide Awake at churches, saying goodbye to faraway family, and spending precious time with dear friends.

-This is Jed's last week of full-time work as he transitions out of his job.  His last day of work at his current job is September 12th.  (just typing that gives me goosebumps on my arms and butterflies in my stomach simultaneously)

If things go as planned we'll be making our big move in approximately 14 weeks.  Good gravy.

  

PS: Although we have a lot of speaking dates lined up we are not too busy to share with you and your friends!  We would love to come to your home or your small group to share about Wide Awake.  We have all the time in the world to answer questions and meet with those who want to hear.  Bring it!

All In.

Home again!  The National Vineyard Leaders Conference was basically amazing awesomeness wrapped up in wonderfulness.
Best.Time.Ever.  I loved every second of it.  

Truth be told, I was a bit nervous heading into this conference.  I may, or may not have shed a few tears over it in nervous anticipation.  Ha!  I wanted Jed to be the one to represent us, but he had to work, so he sent me instead.  He's the "connector extraordinaire".  I'm usually too busy herding kids to do much connecting.  But, God definitely had a plan for me this week.  I'm still reeling in the wonder of it all.

This is an absolutely amazing time to be a part of the Vineyard family.  God is calling the Vineyard out in the areas of justice, mercy, and compassion like never before. 

"If we're Kingdom people- believing that God's kingdom is coming to earth right here and now- than we should be the frontrunners in justice, mercy, and compassion ministries"  
-Tri Robinson

YES!!!  Oh man, I loved it when I heard those words spoken.  To see a room jam packed with Vineyard folks wanting to know how their body can better serve the lost and forgotten did my heart good. I won't soon forget it.  

The theme of the conference was "All In".  "All In" has two meanings.  One meaning is that all ages are "All In".  All are needed for God's full purposes to be accomplished.  We don't just need the young- forgetting about the wisdom of the old.  We don't just need the older- forgetting about the energy of the young.  No.  ALL are needed in this movement.  We honor what each age can bring to the table.  Everyone gets to play.  

The second meaning of "All In", is that we are ALL IN.  Not just dipping our toes in the things of God, not just testing the waters. 
No.  We are ALL IN.   

"We believe that if the pursuit if the Kingdom of God is worth anything, it's worth everything."  

-Phil Strout (National Director, Vineyard USA)

He is worth everything.  EVERYTHING.  
Why not?  
What have we got to lose?  

One speaker that I loved was talking about the fear of the Lord.  He said that what we fear most is what we love most, what we want most in life.  We should fear losing sight of Jesus more than anything else.  More than fear of failure, fear of change, fear of losing my kids, fear of giving everything up...we should fear the Lord above all else.  

We're giving up just about everything to move to Ukraine.  We're all in.  But what do I fear?  I find myself fearing how my kids will do.  I find myself wondering if our kids will hate us for this decision.  I find myself fearing failure.  But, why?   If my kids are perfectly safe and comfy, but I have lost sight of Jesus, than it's all for not.  We must step outside of our coziness, our need for safety and control and fall into His arms.  ALL IN.  Fear losing sight of Him over fear of losing control, fear of being unsafe.  Jesus never called us to safety.  He bid us come and die.  Only then will we know true life. Oh boy, I want true life so badly.  I want to be all in- holding nothing back.  What have I got to lose?  If He is my reason for being...why not spend myself for Him?  

All In is saying yes.  Step, by step, by step we say Yes to Him. Comfort, my expectations, safety, all move aside in order that I might keep Him in my sights.  

“Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it."
Matthew 10:37-39

Will you dive ALL IN with us?  What if you stayed on the same path you're on for the rest of your life?  Would it lead to Him?  What if? What if you said yes to Him today, and the next day, and the next day?  What have you got to lose?  Whatever it is, He is worth it.  

Stirrings.

Something's stirring. 

We only have one chance at this thing called life.

We have one chance to live- truly LIVE.

The things of this world will pass away.

What if we gave our lives away?  What if we stopped grasping for what our society, our neighbors, our friends, even our family tells us is important?  

What if we gave our lives away- all the way? 

What if we spent our lives completely on Him?

It's His breath in our lungs- there for purpose- to live this life for Him alone.
  

"For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will save it."

-Luke 9:24

There's something new stirring in me.  Something more radical than before.  What do I hold on to that doesn't really matter? What do I worry about for my kids that is of no eternal importance?  

I want to live radically for Him.  I want to give my whole life away- holding nothing back.  
Why would we not?  That's what we were created for! 

My world is turning upside down again and I'm not sure what that means, but I'm pretty sure it needed to happen.  

He is worth it.  He is worth giving our lives away.  He is why we were created.  He is why.


 



 

Warm Buses and Warm Hearts...hehehe

It's a well-known fact among my real-life friends and fam that I'm an extra warm-blooded person.  I rarely wear a coat, and Jed constantly bemoans the fact that I'm passing that trait on to our kids.  Who needs a jacket?  They're so bulky!  I'd much rather run from the house to the car to the store and back, than to be suffocated by a bulky jacket.  Don't even get me started on the suffocation factor of scarves.  I get it that they're cute, a little pop of color for an otherwise bland outfit, but am I the only one that can't handle the strangulation?  Just the thought of a turtleneck makes me feel like my airway is about to close.

All that to say, warm weather and lack of airflow is a major downfall to my suitability as a missionary.  If you've ever traveled overseas you know what I mean.  Think warm bus, no windows down, stalled in traffic.  I have to talk myself down from the ledge.  "You actually won't suffocate.  There is air available, just breathe deeply."  

The vent right above my head...doesn't work. 

Where am I going with this?  I have no idea.  I just had to talk it out because as I write this we're on a fairly warm bus headed back to Zhitomir.  I've been sweating for the past 12 days, and so it continues today.  (I'm a Bittner.  We sweat.) Anywayssssss....I just needed you to feel my pain for a sec.  I feel better now.  :)

Now, on to more pleasant topics that don't involve sweat and strangulation.  

This past weekend was loads of fun!  We drove back to Kiev on Friday afternoon with our friend Oleg who happened to be heading that way.  He dropped us at the metro and we headed to the church where they were having a concert to reach the unreached.  We took the metro to the stop we knew was closest to the church and then hopped off.  It's like a 20 minute walk from the metro to the church, and Jed, with his bat-like sense of direction, led us straight there without a hitch.  What a guy.

Jed promptly filled in on the bass and we got to see lots of people we love.  It was a good time.  

After the concert we went home with our friend Sergei.  We had the BEST time staying with Sergei and Alyona.  Seriously.  Being around their kids made us miss our babies something fierce, but we managed.  :)  

Alyona cooked for us and fed us nonstop.  Yum.  Who am I to complain?  Her love language is feeding people, and we're eaters; a match made in heaven.  

On Saturday morning we met Jim and Marianna Peipon (remember Olya and I went with Marianna to visit the baby at the hospital?) at their flat to tag along with them to a picnic.  Fun, fun, fun!  The picnic was for a coalition for children at risk.  Basically, a group of people consisting of Ukrainians, Americans, Russians, and Mexicans, who work with children at risk in various ways around Kiev got together to fellowship and eat together.  They welcomed us with open arms and we had a great time.  It was so fascinating to hear about what others are doing to help kids and how God led them to Ukraine.  We made some new friendships and some good connections.  Who knows what God plans to do with those relationships in the future?  We are open, and excited to find out.  Thank you new friends for making us feel so welcome!  We'll see you again soon with kiddos in tow!

Saturday afternoon and evening we hung out with various friends and laughed a lot.  

Sunday, oh I loved Sunday.  It started out with Alyona feeding us some more delicious food, and ended the same.  Hehe

We headed out to church by taxi after the frantic rusharound of your typical Sunday morning.  It was hilarious to talk (sign/google translate) with Sergei about how Sunday mornings are the same for families all around the world.  "Hurry up!  Eat your breakfast!  Stop hitting your brother please.  Grrrrr."  Then you get to church "Hallelujah...."  Yep.  Sunday morning in Ukraine is just like Sunday morning in Salem.  Why is that?  Hilarious and true.  If your Sunday morning isn't stressful, let me in on your secret. ;) 

After a great time at church we joined our friends in their typical Sunday afternoon hangout.  Everyone takes the marshrutka to our fave: Puzata Hata!  Puzata Hata is a cafeteria-style Ukrainian restaurant.  Delish and cheap with plenty of space for hours of chattin' it up.  As our friend Andrei says "Sunday afternoon is for relationship."

Sunburned...my bad.

After the deliciousness of Puzata Hata we walked for a bit, talking more, till we got to the metro and parted ways.  Sergei and Alyona went to go buy their kids a pet mouse (yep, that's totally not happening at my house) and we went with our friend Elvin to chat more since we won't see him again before we leave Ukraine.  

After that it was home again home again jiggety jig.  Alyona fed us some more, and Jed and Sergei drooled over guitars online- just your typical Sunday night when you live with a musician.  

Anya and I did this:

I give this past weekend two thumbs way up.  We are so blessed to have good friends in Kiev who love us.  The feeling is so mutual.

 

Blind Date on Sunday

Warning, I'm in a bit of a mood.  Not a bad mood, just a quirky mood.  An I'm-not-sure-what-will-come-out-of-my-mouth (or fingers) mood.  You've been warned.  Now feel free to read on.  :)

Today was loads of fun.  I laughed a lot today.  Don't you love days like that?  

Today I got to go to Kiev Vineyard!  I love that place so much.  Jed was super jealous, and you all should be jealous too because it's a wonderful place to be.  Hehe

Last year when we walked into Kiev Vineyard we felt right at home, and I felt that even more this time.  I feel like I can just "be".  I don't have to be "on".  I don't have to be a certain anything.  I am loved just as I am.  I may not understand a lick of the worship or teaching, but I understand the heart, the passion, the love.  Our hearts beat the same as the other hearts in that room and that's enough.  

     

After church my friends Anya and Sasha walked me to the metro because I had a blind date with an American couple.  Anya and Sasha were pretty afraid to leave me to navigate the metro alone.  What? Me, alone in a city of millions of people I can't communicate with, on the metro, alone?  What's to worry about?  Ha!  I wasn't worried at all.  

They wanted to come along, but I promised I would be fine. After I finally promised to call Sasha when I arrived, they let me go.  I felt so loved!  :)

The metro is a people-watcher's heaven.  Seriously.  Old people, babies, people in a rush, people taking their time, people with flowers, people with guitars, Babushkas with big grocery bags.  I just want to squeeze those cute little grandmas!  They're so stinkin' cute!  

Annnnnd I made the trip without a hitch!  Aren't you all proud of me?  

I met Kevin and Debbie Nelson on my blind date and just had the best time.  I can't say enough.  I love them!  The crazy thing is, I got their info from my friend Kim who's been praying for them for a long time now, but she's never met them.  Jed and I thought we shouldn't turn down any possible connection so we emailed the Nelsons and arranged the date.  Then I was talking with a co-worker at the hospital a week before I left for this trip and she told me she has a cousin in Kiev and I should meet her.  Well, the cousin just happens to be the one and only, Debbie Nelson!  Ha!  Destiny's child I tell ya.

Kevin, Debbie, and I went to my fave restaurant, Puzata Hata, so I was instantly happy.  We proceeded to spend the next almost 3 hours chattin it up about life in Ukraine and what brought us all here.  I can't believe I didn't get a picture of the Nelsons because they are just fabulous.  They are real, funny, wise, and faithful.  God first took them to Russia where they served for several years, and now they've been in Ukraine for the past 8 years.  They gave me advice on everything from prayer support, to visas, to apartment choosing, to appliance voltage, to grocery shopping.

(You all know I was thankful for that one in particular!) 

I would totally consider a second date with Kevin and Debbie.  Too bad it can't be tomorrow!  :)

I managed to make it home to Olya's apartment without getting even close to lost, and came home to an apartment filled with friends.  Success.

Tomorrow Olya and I head to Zhitomir to check out the future Johnson landing place and to meet with a realtor.  It should be quite the adventure.  House Hunters International anyone?  

Good night all!  A special good night to my Mom.  Love you Mom!  Happy Mother's Day!  Here's your present! 

(She wants more pictures of me on the blog, just like I can't get enough pics of my babies while I'm gone.  Once a mommy, always a mommy)  :)

Love, Tears, Hope

In a land across the ocean there's a small town nestled among farms and fields.  It has the look of many other towns and villages just like it dotted across the countryside.  Carts being led by cows meander down the lane.  People go about their lives of work and play.  This place is seemingly insignificant, nothing special to look at upon first glance- yet this town holds our hearts. 

Dream come true...

 You see in this town there is a wall with a gate.  Behind that gate our hearts are held hostage.  They have been captured by a group of boys who most people don't even know exist.  "Our Boys".  I know we have no claim to them, no right to call them "Our Boys", but in our hearts they are that.  They are our loved ones, our calling, our dream.  

One day in 2010 God caught our attention and we learned about The Boys.  Since that first moment they have held our hearts.  We have prayed for them, we have wept for them, we have pleaded to God for them.  Last April we got to touch them, look into their eyes, and whisper prayers over them.  I still can't even believe God did that.  It seems like a dream.  I would give just about anything to be back in that place right this very minute.  Somehow we know God has called us there.  We have no idea what God has in store for us and them...but that place, those boys...He's drawing us, coaxing us, keeping our hearts soft toward them, leading us there in His simple way that says "You'll know my plans when you need to know.  Just trust Me."

Today there is heartache for our dear, sweet Boys we love so very much.  

Today we learned that Sasha, one of the Boys, passed away into the arms of Jesus.  

Sasha

I can't stop crying.  You see, Sasha had a family who loved him very much.  He was lost no longer! They were working as fast as possible to complete his adoption.  They had just found out last week that they would get to travel to rescue their baby boy in just 5 weeks.  Oh the celebration!  Oh the anticipation!  Oh the devastation.  

Sweet Sasha, who they were going to name Jonathan, would never have the joy of a family here on earth.  Please keep his loving family in your prayers.  They are so grieved, yet trusting God.  Their faith is so inspiring. Sasha was eight years old and had Down Syndrome.  He was not mobile and most likely spent his life in a crib.  Now He is with Jesus- no more pain, no more tears, no more suffering.  

Now we are the ones with tears.  


I know we've said many times, but it still holds true;

 "Do the next thing.  Say yes to Jesus.  Live a life of yes."

These children need us to act.  These children need us to not turn away because the need is too great.  These children need us to look past our ideas of what our lives would look like and be willing to veer left. These children need us to be the hands and feet of Jesus on this earth.  If not us, who?  If not now, when?  

These children need us to live lives of yes.

Not lives of waiting until all the circumstances are just right.  

Not lives lived in fear of the unknown.  

Not lives spent building our own kingdoms.  

If we are listening to Jesus and saying yes to Him, the circumstances are right- even if they don't look it with our human eyes.  "My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts," says the LORD. "And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine."  Isaiah 55:8

If we are trusting Jesus and saying yes to Him, He gives us peace when we are fearful.  He gives us boldness to step out into the unknown and even joy in the journey.  "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid." John 14:27

"I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”  John 16:33

If we are saying yes to Jesus we are interested in building His kingdom, not our own. "May your kingdom come. May your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven."  Matthew 6:10

"...not my will, but yours be done."  Luke 22:42

I don't want to be harsh.  I hope and pray I don't sound condemning, I just have to speak out.  These children need a voice and because I know them and love them, I simply must speak for them.   

"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  Jeremiah 29:11
That verse is not just for you and me.  That verse is not just for the able-bodied.  God has purpose and plans for all people.  He has a hope and a future for all people.   

We recognize that orphans with special needs are our "yes", so we're going to be pretty outspoken about their need.  But the bigger point of all of this is that each of us say yes to whatever it is God is asking of us.  If it's not this issue- then find your issue and go do something about it.  Act.  Say yes.  Don't hold back.  Live life to the fullest for Him.  Your life, and the lives of others depend on it. 

Between Advents: Come Lord Jesus

Advent.

He is coming.

We wait expectantly.

Come Lord Jesus.

As it is in Heaven, let your Kingdom come to Earth.



Tis the season of Advent.  Tis the season of expectant waiting.  "Advent" comes from the Latin word adventus, meaning "coming".  Advent is the season of Christ's coming.  The world, swollen with expectation and anticipation, eagerly awaited His first coming. 

Now we celebrate that indescribable blessing of Jesus' coming as a baby.  We hold our loved ones near, we smile more, we give thoughtful gifts of love, we eat too much sugar, we decorate with lights and tinsel, we celebrate how He saved our lives.  Tis the season of reflecting on how that tiny baby changed the course of the universe- how that tiny baby changed my life.  I am nothing without Him.  

As Jed likes to say, "We are in between Advents".  The Jews waited for His first coming, and now we eagerly await the second Advent- His second and FINAL coming.  

Jesus came as a baby to make wrongs thing right.  He brought the Kingdom of Heaven to earth.  Even now we see glimpses of His Kingdom on earth.  We see broken bodies healed when we pray, we see loving grandparents passing down a legacy of love and faith to their children, we see friends crossing the ocean to adopt children with special needs- leaving their comfort for the sake of One.  

But, all is not well with our world.  We are standing between Advents- "the now and the not yet".  We see glimpses of His Kingdom come, but His Kingdom is not fully come.  

Orphans waste away in cribs- their childhoods lost- discarded because of a diagnosis.
Innocent children's lives are taken in one day- childhoods lost- because of the depravity of man.   
Sickness runs rampant, wars rage...Oh dear Jesus, please come.  
We wait for You.  

This past week we recorded a couple of Christmas songs.
These songs were sung in celebration of His first coming, and in desperate longing for His return.  We cry out, Come Lord Jesus!  Make wrong things right!  We long for you. 

The songs are available for you to download on our church's website.  We would kindly request that in lieu of purchasing the songs you would please donate to our dear friends, Curtis and Sara Eriksen.  They are in Ukraine right now adopting their newest son David.  Their obedience is a small glimpse of God's Kingdom coming to earth- wrong things made right.  

Thank you Jesus that you came.  Thank you that You still see.  Thank you that You care.  Thank you for keeping your promise that YOU ARE COMING AGAIN.  All will be made right. 

We wait for you Emmanuel...come quickly!

Click here to listen and donate.  We hope you enjoy the songs!  Merry Christmas and God's richest blessings be on you and yours.  :)

A Love Story

On Sunday, June 24, 2012 our friends Curtis and Sara Eriksen's lives changed forever.  A love story began.

The wonderful Eriksen family!

 Sara woke up that morning, made a cup of coffee, turned on her computer to see what was happening out in the world of Reece's Rainbow and their love story began.  

On that day, June 24th, several of us blogger types in the Reece's Rainbow community had decided to rally together for one special boy.  Remember "Porter"?  We had recently discovered that Porter, a 7 year old orphan in Eastern Europe, had been transferred to the Lost Boys institution and our hearts were broken for him.  So we all decided to blog about Porter on the same day.  We would send out his face far and wide, praying and hoping that his Mommy and Daddy would see their boy and decide to go after him.  Well, God loves the orphan with a fierce, tangible love, and that day He answered our prayers.  Sara turned on her computer, saw Porter's face, and instantly knew she was looking at her son.  Curtis agreed.  "Let's go get him!" 

Porter

Oh my word, the excitement when we found out that Porter had a family coming for him!  My excitement was extra because I found out that his family lived in our town, like 8 minutes away from us!!!!  Ha!  I just love how God works.  Jed and I met Curtis and Sara and a friendship was born.  Now our friends, Curtis and Sara are in Eastern Europe to bring home their boy and they need our help.  

You see, this love story (like most) has taken many twists and turns over the past 6 months (holy fast adoption Batman!!).  Sara and Curtis found out in September that there had been some confusion over the pictures of Porter.  They had fallen in love with a little boy in a pink shirt, in a picture on Reece's Rainbow.  Then some other pictures came out from adoptive families in that region.  It was thought by many people that the boy in those pictures was Porter before he was transferred.  Curtis and Sara rejoiced to see their love.  Extra pictures and video are a luxury most don't get when adopting from Porter's country, so this was awesome!  They fell more in love.  Well....in September they found out that the boy in the extra pictures was not, in fact, Porter.  They were, in fact, in love with two different little boys!  How crazy is that?  I'm tellin' ya, only in the adoption world.  Haha!  I remember talking to Sara on the phone, her heart was broken, knowing that in choosing to continue to pursue Porter's adoption they were having to say no to the boy they had grown to love in the extra pictures.  But, they knew God had called them to Porter, so they continued on their love story journey, a little confused, but trusting God had a plan.

Left: Reece's Rainbow profile pic, Right: Extra adoptive family pic

Then in October, some more news came- another twist in the love story journey.  This time the news was good!  Curtis and Sara found out that Porter was not living in the Lost Boys institution!  He was living in an orphanage for healthier children that was located in the same small town as the Lost Boys.  They rejoiced knowing Porter was most likely getting better care at this orphanage.  I remember Sara telling me she was not really surprised because she had been praying all along that Porter's situation was different, better, than his profile on Reece's Rainbow indicated.  Her Mama heart believed the best for her boy and they continued on their love story journey.  

Last week Curtis and Sara arrived in Eastern Europe for the culmination of their love story.  The time had come to meet Porter and make him their son.  There had been many twists and turns, testing of their faith, and all along they had trusted that God had a plan.  Now they were going to get to meet their boy that had loved from afar and prayed for for months.  They had their appointment at the office for adoptions last Tuesday and their love story took a crazy turn none of us saw coming.  Porter has an extra diagnosis that no one here in the US knew about.  Yes, he is  HIV positive, Curtis and Sara were prepared for that.  But he also had a diagnosis that changed the game instantly.  Curtis and Sara are not homestudy approved for this extra diagnosis.  No matter how much they love Porter, they were not able to continue with his adoption.  They do not meet the requirements to adopt him.  

When adopting from Porter's country it is widely known that you never know what you're gonna get till you get there.  Things can be very unpredictable and nothing is set in stone.  Much faith is required.  :)  But nothing can prepare you for the loss of the son of your hearts.  But you know what?  God was not done with the Eriksens.  Their love story continued.  In that moment, in that office of adoptions, they were presented with the files of all the boys who met their homestudy requirements.  In that moment they were to choose their son.  God's love story continued and they chose a little boy named "Marcus".  

Marcus!

Last week they met Marcus and they are completely in love.  They are in the process of adopting him.  Yay! 

The end result of this love story looks different than they had originally thought, but it is a love story all the same.  It is the story of God's love for Curtis and Sara- that He would gently guide them and lead them, using the means He knew they needed, to guide them to their son Marcus. 

It is the story of God's love for Marcus.  As he waited in an orphanage across the world, God was molding and guiding his parents' paths to ultimately lead them to his door.

I believe it is also the story of God's love for Porter.  Porter has now been "seen".  He is not lost.  He is not just a face.  He is loved and cherished- by Curtis and Sara, by Jed and me, by the rest of the Eriksens family and friends, by many many advocates in the Reece's Rainbow community.  We will not forget Porter, and now that we know more about his needs we are able to better advocate for him.  You better believe Curtis and Sara are not going to let him be forgotten.  God has the perfect family for Porter- his love story is not over yet. 

Remember earlier when I said I needed your help?  Well, if you've stuck with me long enough, here's where you come in.  Each child listed on Reece's Rainbow has a grant.  Some grants have only a few dollars, some have thousands of dollars (ahem...Heath!).  These dollars are donated by people who love these children.  The goal is to help offset the costs of the family who decides to adopt that child.  Funds from the child's grant our dispersed to the adoptive family when they receive their invitation to travel to the adoptive country.  Adoption is expensive, so these grants are a life-saver.  

Porter had $4,986 in his adoption grant when Curtis and Sara committed to his adoption. This was a tremendous help to them.  Well, now that they are not able to adopt Porter, those funds need to be returned to his grant fund.  And they should!  I believe Porter has a family coming for him and they will need all the financial help they can get!  BUT, this was not something the Eriksens saw coming.  When working toward fundraising for this adoption they were counting on that money.  Now they need to pay it back to Porter's fund.  

Would you be able to help the Eriksens financially one last time?  They are in Eastern Europe as we speak.  There is nothing they can do to earn money or fundraise while they are there.  They need the Body of Christ to gather around them and love them through this.  Let me tell you something about these people.  They have worked their tails off to fundraise for their adoption!  :)  Every.single.weekend they were doing fundraisers.  They are hard workers, but now they need our help.  

Here's how you can help! ( I just knew you were waiting on pins and needles for that part!)  :)

1.  Donate $$ to the Eriksens adoption fund right here.  Every little bit helps.  I know these people, and I know that they will appreciate every single dollar that comes there way.  Money that is donated to the Eriksen's adoption fund will then be used to replenish Porter's grant fund.  Make sense?

2.  Pass this love story along to others.  Many of us doing our part, big or small, will make a huge difference!

3.  Pray for God's provision for the Eriksens and little Marcus: financial provision, emotional provision, physical provision (Sara is fighting a cold right now).  God is the Provider of everything they need!  Pray for their hearts as they grieve the loss of Porter.

4.  Pray for dear, sweet Porter.  Pray that his Mommy and Daddy find him soon.  Pray that God's perfect plan be accomplished in his life.  Share his face.  Share his story.  Help the Eriksens find a family for the boy they still love- and will always love.

This love story isn't over yet.  God's plans are perfect.  His ways are perfect and I can not wait to see how this all ends for the Eriksens, for Marcus, for dear Porter.  Praise God for His guiding hand and that His ways are higher than ours.  THANK YOU for helping our friends!! 

End of an Era

Along this journey to Ukraine there are many things we have had to let go, or will have to let go.   This month we are letting go of something very important, and along with that comes the end of an era.  We are letting go of our foster care license.  Of course we know we can't still be state-certified foster parents while living in Ukraine, and we haven't been open to taking any kiddos since we made the decision to move our family to Ukraine, but...we still held on to our certification.  We were still foster parents. 

We ran into our certifier (our fabulous assigned "go-to" person at DHS) at the store a week or so ago.  She mentioned that she has been following our story through our blog and is excited about what God is doing in and through our fam.  Hi Judi! :)  She asked if she should just go ahead and close out our file, and we had to tell her yes.  If we were to stay certified we would have to have DHS come out and check out Luke's house, Luke would have to be fingerprinted and all that jazz.  That would all be okay, except for a promise we made to ourselves when we first started fostering.  

Back in 2006, when our foster parenting journey began, we promised ourselves if we took a child into our home we would keep them in our home, no matter what, unless someone else decided they should move.  We wouldn't give up on a child when the going got tough.  That was tested a time or two, but with God's help we kept our word.  If we were to take a child at this time I'm not sure we would be able to keep our word.  When you receive a child from DHS you never know how long they will stay with you.  Seth was supposed to be a "short placement", and here he is, 2 1/2 years later, our son for life.  :)  We plan to move in a year, so we just know we can't take any more foster kiddos at this time.  

Foster Baby #1- always extra special to us

So, I guess this is so long to an era.  Our foster parenting era has been life-changing, to put it mildly.  I've said it before and and I'll say it again, foster parenting is one of the best and definitely the most difficult thing we've ever done in our lives. (Yet!)

 It shaped our family, it grew us as people, it taught us reliance on the Lord instead of our own strength (still learning that!), it built our faith, it gave us a son.

Yes, there are problems with the foster care system.  Yes, it is tiring.  Yes, it is putting yourself out there, knowing your heart will be broken.  Yes, it is infuriating.  Yes, it is worth it.  

 

Because if you can look past the broken system and see the broken lives that God has given us, the church, to care for, it's a no-brainer. 

The children are worth it.  They are worth fighting for.  
The parents are worth it.  They are worth loving and believing in.  

 
The system is broken and it fails people every day.  That is a problem.  But the bigger problem is that God has given the responsibility of caring for these lives to His Bride, the church, and we have passed them off to the state.  People will fail.  BUT God's love never fails, and no matter who they are and what they've done or have failed to do- no one is beyond hope.  No one is beyond His grasp.  The state can't fix these lives and these broken situations, but God can.  He can mend, heal, lift up, restore- and He asks us to be His hands and feet.  


We have come to the end of our fostering journey (for now!).  As we exit stage left, I would just ask you to prayerfully consider your part in caring for the orphans in your town.  How can you be His hands and feet to the broken lives around you?  

Could you foster?
Could you give respite for a weary foster parent in the thick of it?
Could you bring a meal to a foster family?
Could you donate clothes or gently used children's gear to your local Child Welfare office?
Could you pray?

Our torch is being set down, will you take it up?  
Trust me, if we can do it, broken and human as we are, you can do it too! 

Just be prepared to never be the same.  :)

You can read more about our story of foster care here:

Foster Care Ponderings: Part 1, Our Story

Foster Care Ponderings: Part 2, Our Story

Foster Care Ponderings: Part 3, Biological Parents

Weekend at the Farm

We had a great weekend.  

A rain-pouring, wind-howling, cozy-on-in"ing", coffee-sipping, kid-cuddling, hair-cutting, late-night-chatting, friend-loving type of weekend.  After all our moving and cleaning it was just what the doctor ordered.

Friday afternoon we headed up to the Happy Hartman Farm and we're so glad we did.  

Ben and Melanie visited us back in July with their boys, so now it was our turn to to visit them!  Ben and Melanie adopted their son Judd from "The Lost Boys" institution about a year and a half ago and that's how we got to know each other.  We had been email friends for several months and in July we became real-life friends.  We love us some Hartmans!  

Addy and Ez were super excited to be on the road...hehe

It was pretty much pouring down rain the whole time we were there, but that was fine with us!  It was perfect just being together, slowing down, enjoying each other, letting the kids play...

Oh how they played!

Jed and Ben burned up lots of stuff.  So that made Jed happy.  :)

Ridiculously cute Ruger.  Stop the cuteness!!!

Melanie cut my hair (she didn't even disown me after seeing the enormity of my split-end crisis!), Judd, Ruger, and Abraham were adorable (of course), sweet Lanie made cookies (delish), we parentals stayed up late chatting and laughin' it up (my favorite times).  It was a blast.

Of course I can't write about the dear Hartmans without spending a significant amount of time gushing about Judd.  Holy moly, Judd is amazing.  He's saying words now and it is so fun to watch him grow.  He says "Mama", "more", "no", "please", "banana"...and more.  

 

Judd and Daddy

  I know I bragged about him when the Hartmans came in July, but I just can't help myself!  When I think of the life Judd would be living right now if God hadn't plucked him out I want to cry.  He is rescued! 

 Judd is precious.  He is learning, growing, loved.  He kisses his Mommy and Daddy just because.  He hugs and signs "sorry" when he misbehaves (Havalah's hair proved to be quite the temptation..haha).  He loves Elmo and bananas.  He is a treasure.

Ben and Melanie are so awesome.  Many people would say that when it comes to caring for the orphan they have done their part.  They chose Judd, fought to get him, and love him to the moon and back.  They listened and obeyed...and they are still asking God "What do you have for us next?  How can we continue to respond to this need?"  They are doin' the stuff.  We are so proud of them and so thankful to have them as our friends.

***

On our way home we stopped in Seattle for a few hours for some food and fun.

  

Thank you Ben and Melanie for all the food, chats, and lovin'.  We can't wait to come back!!!! 

We just need to rest up a bit first.  :)

PS: Our camera is not to be found since our move...hence the sketchy phone pictures.  I promise to do better next time!  :)