So last night I laid in bed awake till almost 1:00am with a brain that wouldn't shut off. What was I thinking about, you ask?
-What will we do tomorrow?
-I have to take advantage of every moment. What if none of my contact hopes works out for tomorrow? Will it be a "wasted" day?
-Is Mission to Ukraine (MTU) expecting me to come in tomorrow? Hmmm...I better check in with them first thing.
-There sure are a lot dogs barking. Kinda makes me feel like I'm in Kosovo. :)
-I hope Jed gets to Zhitomir okay on Thursday. He won't have a phone...how will I know when to meet him at the city center?
-How will I fit all my kids on the tiny marshrutkas they have here in Zhitomir?
-I kind of wish I had ice cream right now.
-How will my kids make friends here?
-Will we be lonely?
-What will we do tomorrow????? Surely God has a plan, right?
Yeah, my mind was spinning and I was kind of worrying...about everything. People tell me all the time that they could never do what we are doing, or getting ready to do. How do we do it? How are we so brave? Hahahahaha! Now you see. :) We are nothing special. Sometimes we look like deer in headlights. We cry (well, not so much "we", more "me"). We fret. We keep ourselves awake worrying about things we can't do anything about. But, in the end we just put one foot in front of the other and praise God He's not afraid to use cracked, imperfect vessels like you and me to be His hands and feet.
It kind of reminds me of our time fostering. People would always say they could never foster; that it would be too hard to let the babies go after you start to get attached. Let me tell ya, it was too hard. It was impossibly hard. But, God called us to it and He gave us grace for what He called us to. It doesn't mean it didn't hurt like crazy. It doesn't mean we didn't ever cry ourselves to sleep at night because of the heartache. It just means that when He calls you HE gives you every single thing you need to accomplish His purposes. And because of that I would do it all over again in a second.
This is scary. This is wonderful. This is exciting. But trust me; we are not anything special. Talk to our close friends and family. Pass the tissues, 'cause we all got issues. We worry about all the same things you would worry about if you were in our shoes, but we know He will give us every single thing we need to accomplish His purposes. We just need reminders of that every 5 minutes or so.
That truth is not only for us! I don't know who all is reading this, but I know that God wants to remind someone about this truth today.
He is enough. He will make the way. He will smooth the path. His word does what it sets out to accomplish. He doesn't expect you to be super strong or super brave or even a little bit perfect. He asks you to be willing, and the rest is up to Him.
Step out! Act on the dreams God has planted in your heart. Tell Him you are willing and watch what He does. Don't let fear hold you back. Love fully. Live fully. Trust. (I'm preaching to myself today too!)
Isaiah 55:10-13 rocks my world:
"For your thoughts are not my thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares The Lord.
As the heavens are higher than then the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.
As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it."
Oh, but it gets better. Listen to what happens when we trust! This is the best:
"You will go out in joy and be led out in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you and all the trees of the fields will clap their hands.
Instead of the thornbush will grow the pine tree (Ha!!! Yesssss!) and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the Lord's renown, for an everlasting sign, which will not be destroyed,"
It is my joy; it is your joy to partner with The Lord in His work.
Trees clapping, hills singing...bring it.
Trees clapping, hills singing...bring it.